21 years of my life, all in one album

Lost

You can click the album cover to listen to it!

Cover art by: Jesús Abalo

I spent most of the entirety of 2024 working on Lost. It’s been a huge undertaking, but also one of the most special and memorable experiences in my life.

I let myself be very vulnerable with this, which has been super tough, but also transformative.

I collaborated with Ron Snijders, Sianna, Carl Hausman, and FLOORA for the music. And then there’s Joonas Tyni, and Michael Yang, both helping out on the mixing side.

The making of this album was just wild. Wild!

I learned so much, I felt so free, and it was just a super cool and emotional experience that will always keep a special place deep within my heart.

THE MAKING OF Lost

Tracklist

Act 1:

  1. Scars We Cannot See (ft. FLOORA)

  2. Fears And Feelings

  3. Lost

  4. Gone Too Soon

  5. Nevermore (ft. Sianna)

  6. Love And Grief

  7. Survivor’s Guilt

Act 2:

  1. Still Here (ft. Carl Hausman)

  2. Violence (ft. Ron Snijders)

  3. Torment

  4. Vicious Cycle

  5. The Deep End (ft. Ron Snijders)

  6. Stronghold

  7. Intrusive Thoughts

  8. Suffocated (ft. Sianna)

Act 3:

  1. Lost Truth

  2. Hurt

  3. Letting The Darkness In

  4. A Losing Battle

  5. Yearning

  6. For A Broken Dream

Lost is a million stories, interwoven in one. Just like life is. It’s a super personal album, and these emotions are things I have struggled with myself.

It’s about love, it’s about grief, it’s about fear, it’s about allowing yourself to feel, it’s about resentment of violence, and toxic relationships. But all this leads to one thing: purpose.

It's a realisation of accepting who I am. It's also about the imperfection and suffering of life, but how this also makes it special.

It's an imperfect life, but that is exactly the life worth living. All the adventure, all the magic, they all derive from our struggle.

STORY

Lost is broken up in three major acts:

The root of all my pain. In act 1 the life shattering events and feelings are introduced. Scars We Cannot See serves as an intro to the scars they left.

Then Gone Too Soon it’s about all my friends I lost when I was young. They were sick and taken away from earth way too soon. This is something that has always haunted me. Nevermore, Love And Grief, and Survivor’s Guilt are all about lingering pain that has been left behind from this.

Act 1

The act where confusion happens. The act about surviving the damage.

This act is stylistically way more wild and unpredictable, representing the confusion. It’s where I reach my lowest point, and where I need to learn how to work with what I have.

This leads to tiredness, pain, and ultimately a vicious cycle…

Act 2

When this act starts with Lost Truth, I slowly rediscover who I am, and what’s important to me. Then Hurt deals with the feelings of being hurt, which is the first part of acceptance, and ultimately growth.

But in A Losing Battle, there’s a life altering flip, where I start facing my emotions, and ultimately, it’s a realisation of who I am.

All my worst experiences and pains are also my biggest strengths. And instead of holding on to that vicious cycle, I decide to let it be.

Feeling lost is not a curse. It’s a blessing. And it’s the greatest form of freedom anyone can have.

Act 3